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Writer's pictureRachel Hayek

What is Wellness?

Wellness is a way of life for me, and I continually seek new opportunities to merge healthy habits into all that I do. I am always reflecting on how I can do things better and I hold myself to a high standard. As a result, I continually mess up. It's an ongoing journey to come to terms with this.


Even the language I use "mess up" suggests I'm in chaos, disarray.



What exactly IS wellness?

I ask myself:

  • What does Wellness mean to me?

  • What is the first thing that comes to mind when I see or hear this word?

  • What emotions do I associate with Wellness?

  • How much do I value Wellness?

Pondering these questions, wellness is an umbrella term for what feels good, what serves me, how I fill my cup, whether it be through a vigorous hike, a glass of vino, creating something new, balancing my budget, taking supplements, or simply enjoying time with those I love. And yet, I still feel a sense of urgency, a call to action, a voice that says, "Rach, you could be doing more though." Followed by a finger waggle.

Judgments I know in my heart I do a lot of wonderful things to help others with their wellness and I continue to seek ways to care for my human family.

Judgments happen. They are connected to the ego mind and they can and often do cause self-criticism, disappointment, icky feelings in general. Accepting my judgments is a part of my current wellness plan. Noticing when I make a statement that is judgmental and acknowledging it instead of word-smithing to justify said judgment is a habit of the past.


Ahh, that feels good.


And now I'm judging myself again because as a wonderfully imperfect human, I will inevitably express judgments again. Identifying and taking responsibility for my judgments as I notice them going forward is a more realistic way to integrate this a mental/emotional/spiritual wellness habit. If someone else calls me out on something I'm judging, I commit to taking full responsibility. Working in partnership with ego continues...

Self-love

Wellness is self-love in my world. I have the capacity to dig deeper when my cup is full.


Inward I go.

I've recently noticed a curious inner knowingness, that my ability to serve the wellness of others is linked to my willingness to take action to honour my body, mind, heart and spirit. Symbiotic. When we are willing to take action, which includes thoughts, words, and deeds, an unlock happens. Ahimsa.


If we can take a giant step back to look at the bigger picture, it becomes a joy to be willing.

In the moment, it can be so puzzling to see "why" certain occurrences are unfolding. Thoughts like, "I don't understand! Why me? and It's not fair!" can override our sensibilities. In a book on loving kindness, I read that emotions are just as logical as thoughts. Emotions, like thoughts, require our attention for them to be fully conscious. The tricky thing is, if we are immersed in how we are feeling (being), I myself am unable to think about my feelings logically (doing).


And sometimes, it just feels good to wallow. Stop judging.

Take a step back to view the bigger picture. Take a step back from something you are completely immersed in doing. Let it go. Dust your palms together, shake it off.



Now, tell yourself that every vibrating cell in your body, every beautiful strand of DNA, every hair on your head, is precisely where it needs to be in order for you to evolve. Even if you don't believe it, tap into that beautiful imagination of yours and for a few moments, dance with this possibility.

In this reality, you are going to be ok and you are going to learn something, which means you'll grow. Become an even more spectacular version of you. Worst case.

I'd like to add that, though I may look like a peace-loving blessed overly optimistic human through how I express myself, I've had some immense challenges and deep losses and I'm better because of these experiences. Loss of fertility. Early menopause. Divorce. Deceit. Pain.


It all hurts deeply and yet, my gratitude and love for life win over my pain.


Why? It's so simple that I wonder why there isn't more to it. I wouldn't be me. That's it.

When we choose abundance, expansiveness, love, we are supported by the very nature of the Universe. Do you notice that guilt and anger have a heavier energy to them? That happiness, bliss, and euphoria are light and effervescent? By elevating your own vibrational frequency, you nourish yourself and affect others in a positive way. By choosing to be in state of love and abundance, you will continually replenish your own energy and be better able to support your people and your world with your beautiful offerings.


This does not mean do not acknowledge your challenges, or don't be sad/scared/angry. Be in the moment, acknowledge what is real and what is happening, and be open to learning, because this will expand you. With a curious mind, watch how you respond.

Slow Down


We live in a state of overwhelm: information, options, pressure. One of my gifts is slowing down. I woke up early today, without my alarm. I didn’t want to get out of bed so I spent 40 minutes in stillness, snuggled under the covers, sitting with my thoughts. I eased into my day, wrote in my journal, and called my coach for our scheduled session.



We spoke about pressure, the pressure I put on myself to both do and go faster. I'll spare you the narrative in my mind though I will say it's pretty unkind. Do you ever notice that you are unkind to yourself through harsh and mean thoughts? Savouring the moments is so very important and I would even say necessary with all the continuous action, input, output, processing. It's important for my wellness to be aligned with myself and a possibility that showing others how to slow down, since it's easy for me, could be helpful. In fact, I know it is.


Slow down for a moment. Contemplate your gifts. What can you bring into the world to serve both your wellness and the wellness of others? At the end of the day, it's as complicated as identifying every aspect of wellness along with endless tools and checklists to support those aspects. It's also as simple as "what makes me feel good on every level?" I'm learning how to let go of rigidity within my wellness plan and goals as I do love lists. I would encourage you to identify and write out your wellness goals/plan AND at the same time, do a spot check.

  1. Do you feel good?

  2. Are your heart and mind aligned? If they are not, what can you shift to align them?

  3. Are you happy?

  4. How curious are you?


I added the last question above because I've gone through some early transitions with my reproductive wellness, and as a result of the changes in my body and my hormones, my wellness needs have changed. As we grow and change and transition, I think it's imperative to our wellness that we remain open and curious, willing to try new things, willing to accept what is, and direct loving kindness to ourselves.


What is wellness? It is personal. I know what it means to me today, and tomorrow, it might mean something different. For me, wellness is a way of life. You get to choose what it means to you. In order to do this, be present to yourself. Love yourself and fill yourself up first and focus on these over guilt, judgment, self-criticism.


You, sweet soul, are worth it. xo


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